Football

What has the Premier League ever done for us?

19 August 2017 13:00

Football’s back, I’m afraid, and, in the imperishable words of David Mitchell, every kick in every game matters to someone,…

Even in the cesspit of elite football, the Neymar deal has a pungent whiff to it

12 August 2017 9:30

In a quiet season for business news, the giant cesspit that is the world of elite football can be relied…

Girl power: give women’s sport the credit it deserves

6 August 2017 12:00

England won the cricket World Cup for the fourth time. Huzzah! England reached the semi-finals of the European football championship.…

In defence of Neymar’s transfer fee

3 August 2017 17:47

A season ticket at the Parc des Princes, home to Paris Saint-Germain, will set you back somewhere between £336 and…

Why are football fans such patsies?

14 May 2017 9:21

I have been called every name under the sun by a great many people since my defence of Arsenal manager…

Was the Borussia Dortmund bus bombing motivated by greed?

21 April 2017 12:54

It seems the rush to blame the Borussia Dortmund bus bombing on Islamist extremists was wrong. German police have now arrested a…

German football keeps calm and carries on

13 April 2017 9:54

Germany lost a football match but won a moral victory last night, when Borussia Dortmund were defeated 3-2 at home…

Leicester were right to sack Ranieri

24 February 2017 13:40

‘Inexplicable, unforgivable and gut-wrenchingly sad’, ‘nobody can delete the history you wrote’, ‘Shocked after last night’s display!’. No, these aren’t…

The Six Nations is the most exciting sport on the planet

18 February 2017 12:30

Perfection in sport: unattainable, but sometimes you can come close. Moments, people, actions you never tire of watching: Roger Federer’s…

Fifa’s decision to expand the World Cup is a disaster for football fans

11 January 2017 11:34

Disastrous decisions by Fifa are nothing new. But yesterday’s announcement by football’s governing body that it will expand the World…

The FA’s annus horribilis could be about to get a lot worse

8 December 2016 17:07

Football is no stranger to scandal, but the scale of the sex abuse allegations now circling the beautiful game is…

In defence of Eric Bristow

29 November 2016 17:11

The Twitch-hunters, those antsy, intolerant guardians of what it’s permissible to say on Twitter, have claimed another scalp. Eric Bristow’s.…

Stella Creasy: England team’s problem? Too many privately-educated players

22 November 2016 16:21

The English football team have a problem and everyone knows it. After a string of disappointing results, many fans are…

Why sacking the football manager is a fool’s game

28 September 2016 13:25

At last, an English football manager who actually deserves to be sacked (or ‘left by mutual agreement’ if you prefer…

In defence of Sam Allardyce

27 September 2016 16:21

A gastropub in Manchester is a fitting venue for the latest corruption sting on England manager Sam Allardyce. While his poncey…

Transfer deadline day is a countdown to zero and that’s what makes it great

31 August 2016 13:33

For football fans, today is a special day: it’s Transfer Deadline Day – a branded, almost to Hallmark levels, moniker.…

The return of football marks the return of normality

13 August 2016 9:11

With parliament in recess, silly season is in full swing. In fact, silly season would be an apt name for…

Premier League? The football finance deals that should be relegated

22 July 2016 11:19

Finance firms love taking football fans for suckers. The latest is Virgin Money which has this week launched a Manchester…

Spectator competition winners: when sportswriting turns purple

9 July 2016 10:30

The invitation to supply a report on a Uefa Euro 2016 match written in the florid style beloved of some…

The Spectator podcast: Brexit – the first 100 days

9 June 2016 8:14

To subscribe to The Spectator’s weekly podcast, for free, visit the iTunes store or click here for our RSS feed.…

Why Juan Villoro is the best football writer you’ve never heard of

28 May 2016 15:00

Football, unlike cricket, has for the most part been ill served by its writers. For every Brian Glanville and Ian…

My take on the England football team

25 May 2016 9:40

Apologies for the lack of blogs – I’ve been on jury duty for two weeks. Hang the bastard, regardless of…

Leicester City’s title win is the worst thing to have happened to football

3 May 2016 11:24

Jean-Philippe Toussaint, in his recent book Football, observes that the sport is ‘measured and appreciated’ in the imagination. Toussaint, an intellectually fanatical supporter…

Why pretend that female footballers are as good as male ones?

26 April 2016 10:35

Yay – Izzy Christiansen! Yay – Beth Mead! I daresay you were as thrilled as I was to see that…

The art of Jonathan Meades

15 April 2016 13:52

Ape Forgets Medication: Treyfs and Artknacks Londonewcastle Project (28 Redchurch Street, E2), until 23 April Process, means, method: it was these rather…