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Portrait of the week | 28 May 2015

Home A Bill to enable a referendum on whether voters wanted Britain to ‘remain’ in the European Union figured in the Queen’s Speech. Another Bill prohibited any rise in income tax rates, VAT or national insurance before 2020. Tenants of housing associations would be given the right to buy their homes. Provision for Scottish devolution was promised in fulfilment of the recommendations of the cross-party Smith Commission. A ‘powerhouse’ in the north was to come into being through cities being given powers over housing, transport, planning and policing. Laws on strikes would be tightened. Red tape for business would be reduced, and a new quango set up to invigilate late

Steerpike

Alex Salmond insists on Nats dining separately from hacks

The Kennington Tandoori is a favourite late-night eatery for MPs of all persuasions. Last night was no exception, with Tom Watson spotted planning his bid for deputy leader of Labour over curry and beers, and the SNP’s foreign affairs spokesman Alex Salmond seen enjoying poppadoms with a gaggle of Nats. But word reaches Mr S that all was not well with the restaurant’s seating plan. When the SNP gang arrived, they were somewhat unsettled to find that seated next to their table was a group of  journalists, who were also settling down for a curry. After some furtive glances across the restaurant, the hungry hacks were eventually moved to another table, to ensure they couldn’t listen in on the Scottish Nationalists’

The Stalinist logic behind the SNP’s approach to education

Early in the campaign for Scottish independence the SNP commissioned a party political broadcast called Two Futures. It told the story of Kirsty, a baby due to be born on polling day. ‘What kind of country will I grow up in?’ she asks in a childish falsetto. One vision of the future is full of colour and gap-toothed smiles, with children skipping and laughing on their way to school. A nuclear family sit around the breakfast table in a sun-kissed kitchen eating fruit (this scene acts as a useful reminder that the broadcast is set firmly in the realm of fantasy). The alternative is a future in which Scotland votes

Will Dennis Skinner take a pop at the SNP?

He may be a national treasure, but it’s safe to say that Dennis Skinner’s annual crack during the Queen’s Speech have been a bit lame of late. The veteran MP always makes a joke in the silence as Black Rod enters the Commons chamber. Last year we had ‘Coalition’s last stand,’ in 2013: ‘Royal Mail for sale. Queen’s head privatised.’ In 2012 we were treated to the particularly laboured: ‘Jubilee Year, double-dip recession, what a start!’ Skinner is currently involved in a turf war with the SNP over the seat in the Commons he claims he has occupied for the last 44 years. ‘That’s 44 years too long,’ say the charming

Malcom Bruce defends Alistair Carmichael: ‘lots of people have told lies’

Alistair Carmichael’s battle to remain an MP is turning into a debate about whether it’s acceptable to lie in public office. The SNP are keen to talk the up the notion that Carmichael lied (and got caught) and therefore has to go. On the Today programme, his SNP opponent in Orkney and Shetland Danus Skene focused what Carmichael said when the memo was leaked vs. what has become apparent during the investigation: ‘The issue is not the offence but the cover-up, he did actually lie about this, by claiming at the beginning of April that he didn’t know about this memo until the journalist approached him about this … there is a lie here and that’s

Alistair Carmichael responsible for Nicola Sturgeon leak

During the election campaign the Telegraph reported that Nicola Sturgeon wanted David Cameron to remain Prime Minister, after a memo was leaked to them which included an account of a private conversation between Sturgeon and the French Ambassador. Naturally, the SNP leader was furious and demanded an inquiry. The Cabinet Office has now finished their investigation and concluded that the former Scotland Secretary Alistair Carmichael and his spad Euan Roddin were responsible for the leak. When asked about the leak at the time, Carmichael said that ‘The first I heard of this was when I received a phone call from a journalist’: Interestingly, the Cabinet Office has confirmed that the memo did exist and the civil servant believes it was an accurate representation of Sturgeon’s conversation:

Dennis Skinner wins Westminster turf war against the SNP

Of all the MPs to pick a fight with, Dennis Skinner is not high on Mr S’s list. Still, that hasn’t stopped the new SNP intake from spending their first week in Parliament battling the 83-year-old Labour MP. The Scottish Nationalists have been trying to take over the bench where Labour’s awkward squad likes to sit. This bench is where Skinner has sat for the past 40 years and he has no plans to sit anywhere else any time soon. Things have got so bad between the parties over the turf war that they held a crisis talk yesterday: During the meeting MailOnline claim that Labour accused the SNP of ‘bullying’ Skinner. While they failed to agree on everything, it’s

The SNP land grab

Just under 100 years ago the headline in the Oban Times read ‘American family buy lodge and estate on the Isle of Jura’. They were my grandparents, who, although by then British, had both been born in America. They bought our lodge from the Campbells of Jura, who had had the misfortune to lose their heirs one terrible morning in the trenches of the first world war. My grandparents were initially regarded with suspicion by the locals. Yet after investing in the estate, improving the crofters’ cottages, reroofing them from turf to slate, they became well liked within the community. They spent summers on Jura, and occasionally visited in winter.

Political institution introduces new MPs to ancient rituals

While new MPs are sitting through tedious induction classes to teach them the rules of the House of Commons such as never clap in the chamber or call another member ‘you’, down the road another political institution is laying down the law. The Kennington Tandoori has been a home-from-home to politicians for decades, with numerous plots and shenanigans traced back to its darkened doors. Though if the sign that has just gone up in their window is anything to go by, the owners of the curry house are not quite as strict as the men in tights: As for rule no.4, Mr S is unsure how happy the last Scottish Lib Dem MP

Coffee Shots: SNP big in Japan

Just when Mr S thought it was safe to go to his local watering hole now the 56 Scottish SNP MPs have chosen Parliament’s sports and social as their pub of choice, it turns out that the SNP invasion has gone global. Word reaches Steerpike that the presence of the Scottish Nationalists cannot be escaped even outside of the UK. In fact, the revolution has reached as far as Japan: Well, whisky does tend to be a uniting force.

A very modern Parliament causes problems for the Tories

With 190 women elected last week and the number of ethnic minority MPs hitting record levels, Parliament is slowly beginning to look a little bit like modern Britain. Settling in, one male MP, proudly wearing a green new members’ badge, was sitting on the Terrace on his first night in the Commons. He proceeded to use his iPad to conduct a noisy bedtime video call with his wife and young children back in his distant constituency. The sweet scene did not amuse everyone however, with one member of the Tory old guard nosily tutting and harrumphing about a total lack of ‘decorum’ displayed by new Nationalist MPs. There are plenty of

Fraser Nelson

David Cameron needs to learn how to deal with nationalists

David Cameron still has much to learn about dealing with nationalists. Theirs is a very different kind of politics – one where flags, language and choreography matters. Nicola Sturgeon is hawking a false premise: l’Ecosse c’est moi. That Scotland is her country, that David Cameron can visit (as he does today) in the same way he visits France or America. It matters to Sturgeon that the talks are presented as those between two heads of state (with the flags arranged in that way), that the premise of the talks is what more he can give her government (which she abbreviates to ‘Scotland’). And Cameron falls into her trap. The SNP

Letters | 14 May 2015

Scotland’s silent majority Sir: Hugo Rifkind’s article (‘Scotland’s nasty party’, 9 May) is a first for the media. It expresses the dismay, disbelief and incomprehension felt at the rise of the SNP by least one — and I suspect many — of the silent majority in Scotland. When will the media confront Nicola Sturgeon’s claim to speak for Scotland, as opposed to allowing her to deliver an unchallenged party political broadcast? She can only speak for the SNP, who at best can speak for half of Scottish voters. Not in my name. I want no part of her strident, demanding, aggressive brand. The article did omit one issue. Thousands of young

Portrait of the week | 14 May 2015

Home David Cameron, the Prime Minister, soon got used to the surprise of the Conservatives being returned in the general election with a majority of 12. He retained George Osborne as Chancellor of the Exchequer and made him First Secretary of State too. Theresa May, Philip Hammond, Michael Fallon and Iain Duncan Smith also stayed put, but Chris Grayling replaced William Hague, who had left the Commons, as Leader of the House, to be replaced as justice secretary by Michael Gove, who was replaced as chief whip by Mark Harper. Amber Rudd became Energy Secretary. John Whittingdale became Culture Secretary in place of Sajid Javid, who became Business Secretary. Boris

Diary – 14 May 2015

For the 2005 general election, I had a party featuring a gigantic cheesecake with differentiated segments by allegiance. It contained no purple, which you could call leftie bias, but it genuinely didn’t seem necessary. It certainly wasn’t because I couldn’t think of a purple fruit. The Lib Dems did badly out of that, but mainly because you should never put banana on a cheesecake; they did fine in 2010, when I represented them with lemon macaroons. No colourful theming for 2015; the stakes were too high, and I decided that it was a waste of soft fruit. Just booze and crisps and, by 10.15, depressed people; exactly like 1992, in

James Forsyth

Making Labour work

[audioplayer src=”http://rss.acast.com/viewfrom22/thelastdaysofmiliband/media.mp3″ title=”Dan Hodges and Andrew Harrop discuss the final days of Miliband” startat=34] Listen [/audioplayer]The Labour party is in a worse position today than after its defeat in 1992. Then, the electorate sent Labour a clear and simple message: move to the centre, don’t say you’ll put taxes up and select a more prime ministerial leader. This time, the voters have sent the party a series of messages, several of which are contradictory. The reasons Labour failed to win Swindon South are very different from why it lost Morley and Outwood and the reasons for that defeat are different again in Scotland, where almost all seats fell to the

Tory MP teaches SNP MPs Westminster etiquette

On Monday when 56 SNP MPs descended on Westminster, the youngest of the new intake Mhairi Black gushed that everyone had been so nice. Two days in, and cross-party relations have begun to cool. Carol Monaghan, the MP for Glasgow North West, claims that Simon Burns, the Tory MP for Chelmsford, scolded her as well as her fellow SNP politicians for their bad etiquette: However, Burns has clarified the situation to Mr S: ‘I was giving a talk about how to debate in chamber. If you agree you say ‘hear, hear’ and I mentioned that in recent years an unfortunate habit of clapping has occurred and that is deplorable. The talk was to everyone, not just the SNP,

Rod Liddle

It’s Labour’s loss if they don’t take Ukip voters seriously

Almost four million people voted for Ukip on 7 May. That, in itself, is an astonishing achievement for a party which is a) newish and b) endured more vilification than even Ed Miliband had to put up with, from both the press and of course the BBC. It would be nice to think that at some point we will get over our obsession with the SNP and Nicola Sturgeon – and start taking Ukip as seriously as we do the Nats. Or, almost three times more seriously, if we wish to be properly democratic. Ukip was crucial to the Conservative victory, taking enormous numbers of votes from Labour supporters north of Watford. Labour

New SNP MPs take drinking advice from Alex Salmond

Ahead of the arrival of 56 SNP MPs in Westminster yesterday, Alex Salmond offered his new colleagues some advice in a recent interview. He said: ‘Make your voice heard, represent your constituents, and stay out the Strangers Bar’. So far, so good. In fact, Salmond will no doubt be glad to hear that his fellow MPs have taken his advice and stayed out of the Strangers bar. Instead, they have opted to make Parliament’s sports and social bar their new base. Word reaches Steerpike that a few members of staff had their noses put out of joint last night when the lesser frequented bar was unexpectedly busy. ‘It was packed full of the SNP gang – on a Monday,’

How will SNP MPs operate in Parliament?

Most of the new SNP MPs celebrated their party’s amazing result in the general election today with a photo call outside Parliament. They certainly looked an impressive bloc of parliamentarians, illustrating just how different this Parliament will look and feel from the last. But one of the interesting questions is how much freedom will these new MPs have to pursue their own interests, or whether they will be expected to operate as a bloc, and not outside the bloc. Many backbench MPs take up personal campaigns on a matter affecting constituents, or a small issue where they hope they can effect a change in the law. Some do this when