Lucy Vickery

George Galloway being evicted from the Celebrity Big Brother house in 2006. Photo by Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images

Spectator competition winners: Red-Lycra-ed Galloway, G

21 January 2017 12:03

Entries came flooding in following the invitation to submit poems about a politician and an item of clothing. Michael Foot’s…

Frankie Howerd. Photo by Joe Bangay/Daily Express/Hulton Archive/Getty Images

Spectator competition winners: Nigel Farage channels Frankie Howerd

14 January 2017 10:15

The latest challenge was to submit an extract from a politician’s speech ghostwritten by a well-known comedian. At the 1990…

Photo by Oli Scarff/Getty Images

Spectator competition winners: The Lion, the Witch, the Wardrobe and the Unlicensed Import of Wild Animals

7 January 2017 10:45

Quercus Books recently published a series of parodies of Enid Blyton’s Famous Five stories which reimagines the five as adults.…

Image: Getty

Spectator competition winners: ‘We the three chief Brexiteers are…’: carols with a topical twist

18 December 2016 10:20

This year’s yuletide challenge was to supply a carol with a topical twist. ‘In the bleak midwinter’ just about captures…

Photo by Daniel Berehulak/Getty Images

Spectator competition winners: Henry VIII on Donald Trump

4 December 2016 9:25

The latest competition, to submit an extract from a speech in which a well-known figure from history comments on a…

Couple in the park: Walking on grass with dog

Spectator competition winners: Whenas in jorts my Julia goes

27 November 2016 12:21

Competitors were invited to supply their own nine-line twist on Robert Herrick’s ‘Upon Julia’s clothes’: Whenas in silks my Julia…


Spectator competition winners: a resignation letter from God

19 November 2016 9:45

This time around you were invited to supply resignation letters from God. Despite mankind’s attempts to kill Him off, God…

Porlock Hill (Getty).

Spectator competition winners: the Person from Porlock unmasked

12 November 2016 10:30

The request for your thoughts, in verse or prose, on who the Person from Porlock might have been (assuming, of…

Grayson Perry poses with his artwork 'Urn For The Living'

Spectator competition winners: odes on a Grayson Perry urn

5 November 2016 9:45

For the latest competition you were invited to compose odes on a Grayson Perry urn. Jonathan Jones memorably described being…

Photo: PAUL ELLIS/AFP/Getty Images

Spectator competition winners: Jeremy Corbyn’s sonnet for Diane

29 October 2016 9:45

The invitation to submit poems written by the Labour party leader was initially inspired by the recent publication by Shoestring…

Professor Atsuki Higashiyama (C) poses with students to show how objects look different when one bends over and views them through one's legs, for which research he won the Ig Nobel Prize. (Photo by The Asahi Shimbun via Getty Images)

Spectator competition winners: Not the Nobel Prize winners

22 October 2016 8:37

The latest challenge was to supply an extract from an Ig Nobel Prize-winner’s speech that describes the ‘achievement’ (invented by…

Colorful autumn leaves.

Spectator competition winners: Autumn poems

15 October 2016 9:30

The seasonal challenge to submit a poem about autumn in the style of the poet of your choice was predictably…


Spectator competition winners: how the aphid became and other creation tales

9 October 2016 9:41

The invitation to take the title of a short story by Ted Hughes, How the Whale Became, substitute another animal…

Jeffrey Archer. Image: Getty

Spectator competition winners: famous authors’ prime-ministerial ambitions

1 October 2016 16:08

In 1959 Ian Fleming wrote a fascinating essay for The Spectator under the headline ‘If I were Prime Minister’. In…

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Spectator competition winners: politically correct nursery rhymes

24 September 2016 9:45

For the latest competition you were invited to filter popular nursery rhymes through the prism of political correctness. Some years…

Image: Getty

Spectator competition winners: selfies in verse

17 September 2016 9:45

It was Edna St Vincent Millay’s sonnet-about-the-sonnet ‘I will put Chaos into fourteen lines’ that prompted me to invite a…

Citizen Khan. Photo by Eamonn M. McCormack/Getty Images

Spectator competition winners: the world’s worst sitcom

10 September 2016 9:30

The latest call was for stonkingly bad ideas for children’s books, an Olympic sport, a television sitcom or a reality…

The Angel of the North. Image: Getty

Spectator competition winners: taking poetry in new directions

3 September 2016 9:45

Tennyson’s lines ‘bright and fierce and fickle is the South,/And dark and true and tender is the North’ (from ‘The…

Lord Byron, bulbous part not pictured. Photo by Hulton Archive/Getty Images

Spectator competition winners: authors’ appendages

28 August 2016 9:45

In the latest competition you were invited to supply a poem about a body part of an author of your choosing.…

Photo by Matt Cardy/Getty Images

Spectator competition winners: Boris Johnson’s diplomatic limericks

20 August 2016 9:30

The latest challenge called for limericks that might have been written by Boris Johnson in an attempt to smooth ruffled…

Image: Getty

Spectator competition winners: Double rhyme time

15 August 2016 18:15

The latest competition called for poems on the theme of summer in which the last two words of each line…

An ode for Theresa May: Spectator poetry competition winners

6 August 2016 9:35

There was a good response to the call for poems on a political theme entitled ‘May day’ but the mood…

Donald Trump speaking at a campaign rally in South Carolina. Image: Getty

Spectator competition winners: Donald Trump on making heaven great again

30 July 2016 9:30

The invitation to submit a conversation between St Peter and a well-known figure who is demanding admission to heaven. Although…

Image: Getty

Spectator competition winners: ‘On First looking into Article 50 of the Treaty of Rome’

23 July 2016 10:00

The latest competition asked for poems with titles which riff on that of Keats’s sonnet ‘On First Looking into Chapman’s…

A festival-goer at Glastonbury. Image: Getty

Spectator competition winners: festivals with twat-appeal

16 July 2016 9:45

The call for extracts from the unappealing-sounding programme of a festival that is making a misguided attempt to stand out…