Regal austerity

9 December 2013

4:58 PM

9 December 2013

4:58 PM

These are troubled times for Princess Michael of Kent. Austerity has hit Kensington Palace. ‘We’ve cut back dramatically,’ she tells the Times. ‘I mean we never go out to dinner unless we go to somebody’s house. We never go to restaurants. That’s too extravagant.’

It sounds just ghastly. And, I regret to say, that the princess travels in less style than she used to: ‘I love Easyjet. It’s the only direct route to Biarritz. We always fly tourist-class anyway in Europe.’

Although it may sound like the Baroness Marie Christine Anna Agnes Hedwig Ida is enduring Dickensian privations, she does say: ‘for long-haul, we go club.’ Phew! I was about to call for a whip-round.

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Show comments
  • Swanky

    If austerity can hit Kensington Palace, I wonder whether it can also work the other way around. <——- I'm over here, God <———

  • Alexandrovich

    Tsar Nicholas doesn’t look bad for his age though.

    • Swanky


    • Doggie Roussel

      Inbreeding manifests itself in many strange ways !

  • Colonel Mustard

    I compare her to Baroness Ashton who demands a personal jet and begrudge her nothing. Do a piece on that lefty parasite’s pretensions to grandeur instead.

    • Doggie Roussel

      I suppose Mrs Troubridge is marginally more fragrant than Baroness Ashton… mind, that would not be a Herculean task.

    • dalai guevara

      Pah! These are tough times. May I confirm that one had to let go the pastry chef in a recent reshuffle at the Dalai Estate. The landlord benefits are just not trickling down as ostentatiously as to which one is accustomed.

      • Colonel Mustard

        I don’t think Baroness Ashton is feeling much pain, comrade. She has been riding the champagne socialist gravy train for rather a long time and is now comfortably ensconced in First Class on the Euro gravy train.

        I concede though that for you socialists the Royal Family are indeed useful distraction scapegoats in the politics of envy.

        • dalai guevara

          That may or may not be the case according to your judgment, but that is not what this article is about.

  • Curnonsky

    She wants taxpayer-funded first class air travel and lavish dinners? Who does she think she is – a BBC mid-level manager?

  • terregles2

    Well I suppose it is the the panto season.

  • RightWingGraham

    So Karma is real then? More of the same please God 😉

  • Doppel1800

    My wife was just about to purchase the Speccie annual subscription but this sort of piece puts me off.

    • post_x_it

      Never mind that. Did it put HER off, or did she buy it?

  • Doggie Roussel

    This is beyond parody !

  • Eddie

    Couldn’t she just flog her dad’s Swastika collection? She’d get a small fortune for his old SS uniform, I’m sure…

    • Doggie Roussel

      This woman is awesomely influential… she snaps her fingers and the Vatican annuls her perfectly legitimate marriage to poor Mr Troubridge.

      She stomps into a New York restaurant and demands to be re-seated when placed near a table of Afro-Americans… perhaps they reminded her of the aborigines from her childhood in a working-class suburb of Sydney.

      Never have I ever seen such chutzpah… oops… that might grate with her Third Reich connections.

      And her imbecilic husband remains steadfastly at her side, A jewel-collared nodding dog in the back of their grace-and-favour Rolls Royce.

      Bring it on fellas… we need more minor royalty baiting… this creature is an abomination!

      • Eddie

        I didn’t know she grew up in Australia. Funnily enough, I don’t care either. She is so divorced from reality she might as well have grown up on the moon.
        She could however sell her hat collection – or get one of her slaves to take em to the car boot sale. I am sure some lower class poor people could use them as TV satellite dishes.

        • Doggie Roussel

          Yes, she grew up in a working-class suburb of Sydney, but claims she is descended from Charlegmagne… whom, I don’t believe was the founder of Cronulla.

          She first married a Mr Troubridge, but when the scrofulous, nodding dog from the Royals loomed, she quickly obtained an annulment from the Vatican and now struts her stuff in Kensington Palace.

          She always stresses her immaculate breeding and taste and was heard to remark on how common Fergie was…. although this did not prevent her sharing a mutual interest in a bit of American rough trade.

          Altogether a quite abysmal woman.

  • sir_graphus

    Funnily enough, I met the Michaels of Kent, yesterday. Met them in the sense of a nodded mutual hello/thankyou each. They, particularly she, were immaculately charming and said nothing racist at all. I thought they were lovely.

    • Doggie Roussel

      Have you thought of patenting your social-climbing skills, Sir Graphus ?

    • Noa

      The Princess continues to act as a role model, setting the standard for balancing thrift with economical foreign holidays, whilst continuing to subsist on the public purse.

      • Doggie Roussel

        Aaaah, bless her !